Catching up. 20 & 21.

The last week and a half has been chaotic and well, things happened that made posting Isla's portrait from last week fairly challenging so, I am posting two portraits today. One from this past week and one from the week before.

A Portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014.

20/52

Isla: You may have the sweetness nap time hair I ever did see. It seems to wake up happy. Just like you!

21/52

Isla: Finally home from our crazy adventure, having fun with daddy in the front yard blowing dandelions. Mom had fun trying out pigtails in your hair for the first time.

Linking up with Jodi.


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As mentioned above this past week (+) has been a chaotic one. Last Saturday, May 17th, Isla and I left on what was supposed to be a wee weekend adventure. We were going to join Ben up at a Young Life Conference just outside of Princeton. We arrived in Princeton at around noon. Isla was happy to be out of the car and was quite enjoying all the people and new things, she was also very happy to see her dad.

Early Sunday morning, around 3am, I woke up with a LOT of pain and nausea and sat over the toilet trying to puke for about an hour. After nothing came of it I thought I'd try to get back to sleep, maybe I could sleep it off. I woke up and still felt quite ill but thought that maybe breakfast would settle my stomach. After breakfast, around 8:45am, I started walking back up to our room and ended up stopping several times because my side was aching so much.

Long story short I ended up having an emergency appendectomy that night, Sunday May 18th, at about 8:00pm.

We were very fortunate to have friends who lived in the town where I had the procedure and Ben and Isla were able to stay with them. We did the big drive home on Wednesday May 21st, and were finally back home on Thursday.

We have been so very taken care of and feel so fortunate to have such an amazing and caring community surrounding us. We are truly thankful to all those who have made this time of challenge so much easier. God has definitely shown us his love through those who have helped us through this.

I Am A Mother.

I remember being young and drawing pictures of what I wanted my family to look like when I was older.
My Husband.
My Children.
MANY Children.
the order, the age gap, the gender, the names. I would draw and I would image and I would dream.
I was a bit of an idealist, I'm still a bit of an idealist.
But,
Oh did I ever want to be a mother.

Now, here I am and I can say that - without a doubt - my dream has come true. I am a mother. It may not look exactly like the pictures I drew when I was young but, it is so much better.
Yes. There are days that are rough, there are days where I lose myself in the chaos that surrounds me, times where I clean up the same mess about a dozen times; There is diapers to be laundered, clothes to be folded, meals to be made, but that love...oh that love, it is all encompassing. The love for my child is more than I ever imagined. The way she smiles when I enter her room in the morning, how her sad sobs break my heart, how she knocks on the bathroom door when I'm bathing...expecting an invite.

I am not trying to say that being a mother is an easy job, I am not trying to down play any difficulty, because there is a lot, I'm saying that even if it is the most challenging job you will ever have it is the job you will love the most.

I often feel very blessed to be so lucky. There are many women out there that would love to be able to be a mother, there are many women who wish that they could be pregnant, women who are going through infertility, women who are looking into adoption, there are so many who long to be mothers. My heartaches for them, as they are mothers...they just have yet to hold their child. 

So to all the mothers out there
ALL of them (those trying to conceive, those going through a loss, those going through adoption, those that are young, those that are old, those who have mothered many through foster care, and those who are blessed to hold their child.)

Happy (late) Mothers Day! You are a Mother.

19/52

A Portrait of my daughter, once a week, ever week, in 2014.

Isla: Besides being outside your favorite place is likely the window sill. You would sit there happily for hours if I let you. You are a keen observer and so enjoy watching the world around you, waving at everything that goes past our window. It is so very sweet.

Joining up with Jodi.

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We have had a busy week, I can't believe that I am so late at posting. I swear it was just Sunday. I have a whole Mothers Day post written up that I just haven't had the chance to go through and edit/post. Hopefully things will slow down soon and I can finally get a chance to catch up.

18/52

A Portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014.

Isla: A point and a grunt in the direction of the thing you want or the place you want to go. You are becoming even more determine and strong willed, even the way you communicate.

Joining up with Jodi for the 52 project.

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This week has been a rough one. On Monday evening Isla became feverish and was quite fussy, the fever continued for a few days peaking and falling. On Thursday she was quite listless, honestly she had just not been herself at all during the week but having her lay in my arms for almost an hour not asleep but zoned out concerned me a LOT! So to the doctors we went. He was not sure what was going on and said he would like to see about getting a urine sample. We tried that evening with no success. Friday morning I went in to get her and started nursing and I noticed a rash on her torso and back. That's when I got concerned. Up to the ER we went and after hours of trying to collect a urine sample, thankfully no UTI, we were told she most likely had Roseola, not something too concerning. So now the rash has diminished and she is slowly becoming her old self.